destiny's calling

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Today: Left me speechless. I know this is 3 words. How am I supposed to put it together? Lol. Speechless me. Hahaha okay that works.

I keep trying to tell myself that things will be alright if I just accept it and move on, but as the days pass I find it harder and harder to commit myself into tolerating this. How am I supposed to respect you, when you look down on all of us?

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Rgs symphonic band played a really really really nice piece during assembly today. It reminded me of Rome, churches, toy soldiers (haha I don't know why but they're cute and majestic at the same time, see), Cinderella, magic and Disney. Btw Disney and magic comes together. It's like no magic = no disney, no disney = no magic. I love Disney :) This sounds retarded but I was just closing my eyes and imagining myself lying on a pretty green field. I don't mind being an ant HAHAHA.

Went to shop with Juey and Sherby after school for birthday presents for various people. Haven't hung out with Sherby since last year! That poor girl is so stressed out by all her work and OM. All the way kay sherbz I'm here for you :))

I'm pretty proud of the presents we bought actually. (y) Although I swear my back almost broke while walking around haha my bag's too heavy! I need a new bag like badly. I want a plain red Eastpak! So sexy :) Okay I shall do up a wishlist for my birthday soon hehehe.

Oh yeaaa, I walked past 207 the other day, and some of them were hanging outside the class. One of them was like "Eh Elaine, why you never come visit us anymore! Forget us already ah!" And I was suddenly overwhelmed by guilt and happiness. Guilty because, well duh, I haven't been visiting. But happy because I'm so touched that they still remember 107 classics'10 :) It's been almost a year since we addressed them as their PSLs, and I miss those times where we'd just freak out about what to do for psl sessions because things never go according to proposals anyway. They're like one of the many many things/people that GMH :) I think having a sec 1 class like this, one will be enough. Omg I still have the little notes they wrote to me after I stupidly cried during one of the PSL sessions hahaha. On hindsight, that was really irresponsible of me. Could've scared them to madness. But oh well I miss the feeling of having people look up to me hehehehhe :P

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Okay. I checked my stats, it says 3 views from America. This is really dumb and probably wishful thinking but the first thing that came to mind was, could you be reading this? It's been a while - to be exact 2 months - since we've talked, and to be honest I don't even dare to talk to you. I'm afraid to know your reaction, and I'm afraid to know that you haven't forgiven me. I wish I could turn back time and undo the very first choice that I've made that started this whole thing. If I hadn't been so impulsive, we could've still been friends now. That's almost 3 years of friendship destroyed by a decision made with too little thought. If you're reading this, I just want you to know that I'm sorry, sorry, and sorry with a cherry on top ): Sigh I know there's no way I can make it up to you, but I'm just praying that you're happier right now kay.